 |
| Romney and Obama during one of the debates |
2-When Obama passes a pitcher of ice lemonade, he
accidentally spills some on Romney, in which he begins to malfunction and break
down, finally revealing that he is indeed a robot.
3-Despite appearing on both men's Netflix's queues, no one
mentions the documentary "2016: Obama's America", "Frontline: The Choice 2012", a PBS documentary profiling both of them, the George Clooney drama "The Ides of March", and the Will Ferrell comedy "The Campaign".
4-Joe Biden will interrupt multiple times during the meal as
he tries to show off the new karate moves he is practicing in order to finally
get his black beat.
5-Bo, the Obama's family dog, will also interrupt multiple
times as he tries to get both men to check out a very deep hole that he dug out
in the back yard that contains several bones that may or may not be the remains of dinosaurs.
 |
| Bo the Dog |
6-Obama and Romney will finally be able to talk trash about
Paul Ryan, eventually laughing and giggling as they watch old clips of his
speeches, the VP debate, and that TIME magazine photo shoot.
7-One of the items on the menu, baked chicken on a bed of
steamed vegetables, is quickly changed for a large plate of hot buffalo wings
with a basket of potato wedges, sweet potato fries, and many small containers
of ranch dressing. There is a buffalo wing eating contest. The first man to eat
ten wings without crying wins a bowling trophy with the sticker "White
House Buffalo Wing Champion 2012." Loser has to buy dinner the next time
both of them are in the same city.
8-There will be a brief discussion on how to end the NHL lockout, which will be quickly abandoned once they realize that neither of them
is at all interested in hockey.
9-Someone's cell phone ring goes to a particularly catchy
pop-rock song in the hallway (most likely a member of the Secret Service). They
spent ten minutes trying to figure out the name of the song, even going far as
whistling and humming the song into a music app that figures out the name of
songs.
10-It will be discovered that someone in the Oval Office
Googled "Things You Wanted to Know About a Mormon But Were About to Ask"
shortly before the luncheon. Whether the president asked Romney anything
Mormon-related questions was never known.
11-The second half of the luncheon will consist of both men discussing
and debating about their predictions and picks for the upcoming Academy Awards.
While either has seen Life of Pi, both are fans of Ang Lee but are not fans of
3D movies, though Romney will admit that he enjoyed The Avengers. Both agree on
Daniel Day-Lewis for Best Actor. They will be divided over Best Actress, though
both easily agree that Jennifer Lawrence is by far the most attractive
prospective nominee.
 |
| Jennifer Lawrence |
12-Inspired by talk of Marvel's The Avengers, Romney
suggests that Nick Fury should be considered for Secretary of State. Obama will
consider the suggestion.
13-The quest for the mystery song is resolved when Obama
asks a passing staff member the name of the song after he and Romney hum the
bars of the chorus. The staff member mentions that the song is "You CanHave It All" by Lo Ya Tengo. Romney downloads the song onto his iPhone
while Obama adds it on a Spotify playlist named "Power Lunch Soundtrack."
14-Originally dessert is a freshly baked apple pie. Romney
suggests they go to a bakery in Georgetown where they serve these
mouth-watering red velvet cupcakes. This is also where the great Cupcake Eating
Contest takes place. Joe Biden wins by a landslide.
15-When their time together comes to an end, both say their goodbyes and agree to follow one another on their personal Twitter and Facebook accounts, on the condition that neither posts prolific videos form YouTube, those someecards, or links to the Huffington Post.
No comments:
Post a Comment